Man, I’m glad I’m not playing THAT game.

Dear Warhammer fans,

We know the recent patch was a bit of a letdown, but please let us explain. We have a lot going on around here, and we are still new to this MMO thing. We also don’t have the resources or player base to really test everything as much as we’d like. Plus I’m sure you have noticed our furious pace of content updates and fixes, all free of charge!

The reason we did not include anything beyond a Fortress siege is because we wanted to keep the end-game accessible to all players, and we felt that including anything harder than the most basic and recycled content would be too difficult and exclude members of our awesome community. You might also have noticed we did a copy/paste from DAoC for the Fortress, but come on, it was awesome content then, why not use it now?

For those seeking a true challenge, you can now attempt to kill a Fortress lord without wearing armor, earning you the title “slap in the face”.

You may also have noticed we disabled scenarios. We found a bug that was crashing the server when too many players wanted to PvP, and so in order to accommodate everyone, scenarios have been removed. We would like to point out that while we removed scenarios, we did add the “slap in the face” challenge, which we find is a suitable replacement. Scenarios will be added back into the game ‘soon’.

We have significantly nerfed many classes. Our data has shown that too many players were killing Fortress lords, and while the actual city siege content is coming ‘real soon’, for now we have decided to increase the challenge by nerfing the players. We realize this might not be popular, but we remind you that our game is still very new, PvP balance is like, really hard, and how can you expect us to balance 9 classes with our limited budget? To compensate for the massive nerfs, along with the continual ignorance of class bugs, we have added a new purple pony mount. The mount has a .01% drop rate whenever a Fortress lord is killed without the use of weapons.

Finally, we know many of you are excited to finally play the one class we added with the recent paid update. Unfortunately a bug crept into our air-tight testing facility, and the class has been disabled for many of you. Rest assured, the next paid update should give you access. That updated is coming ‘soon’.

We know this might not be the news you were hoping for, but rest assured that in the coming months (read: years), we have many exciting changes coming, including fixing instance lag that has only been around since 2005. You might get your mail to work as well, but no promises.

Ah waitwrong game.

19 Responses to Man, I’m glad I’m not playing THAT game.

  1. Hudson says:

    Ha ha. A bit harsh but I get the implication. No one said Blizzard was perfect but I will take that client over the WAR one any day

    But yes, I am glad I am not playing Warhammer. Why? I could give to sh*ts about PVP. All this affected my WoW gameplay once and when it did I was back online doing my thing.

    Like I said: I know it wasn’t an alliance win in Wintergrasp because we suck and we could never cause a server crash.

    http://tobolds.blogspot.com/2009/01/is-patch-308-disaster.html

  2. Ravious says:

    It is amazing though how much of Mark Jacobs you did channel in to the post… scary, almost.

    Next up 309 deletes your registry.

  3. pitrelli says:

    well im lucky I started from scratch and am still a low level 57 so it doesnt bother me too much.

    I agree with Hudson though Im more than happy to be back playing WoW. WAR is no more than a bad dream to me now and iv added it to my MMO deadpool along with Conan, Dungeons and Dragons, Vanguard etc etc.

    Each to their own ans all that, however, if your not actively playing it why get in digs?

  4. Hoki says:

    I play Warhammer and Warcraft so I feel I’m able to make this comment without being overly biased towards one game or another.

    ————

    I wonder if there is a psychological reason people who quit warcraft continue to talk about it just as much as when they were playing it?

    If you have lost interest, stopped playing, and the game is in your opinion a bag of rotted horse testicles… why devote so much time thinking/talking/posting about it?

    What are we, 11 year olds in a playground again? – “My games better than YOUR game! Nyaah Nyaah!”

  5. PTD says:

    Here we go again, eh Syncaine? Stick to WAR, would ya? I have had zero issues since the latest patch. I’m sure that everything Mythic has put out has been absolutely golden and bug free. Of course they had to lance half their planned content shortly before release to get there, but it was “for the good of the game” I’m sure.

    @Hoki

    I’ve seen it time and again in my many, many years playing MMOs. When people leave a game, they don’t stop griping about it for years afterwards.

  6. raivyne says:

    gee warhammer must really suck.

    I play WoW and haven’t had any issues with our latest patch.

    ;)

  7. Snafzg says:

    To be fair, I see this post mainly directed at the WoW folks who heckle the issues of WAR at every opportunity, all the while thinking their **** doesn’t stink, or rather, their game is a immune from such issues as well. Syncaine has an oft-repeated distaste for the game, however, I don’t feel as though this was a dig at the game itself, just the holier-than-thou community that supports it.

    And to set the record straight, every game has a community of holier-than-thou supporters. I wouldn’t call this the most mature post I’ve read around here, but that’s another issue. :P

  8. H00LiGAN says:

    Agree with Snafzg. It’s the same people who forget about WoW’s launch troubles that are giving WoW a free pass now.
    And this is coming from someone who is currently playing WoW and not WAR.

  9. syncaine says:

    Another part of it was to poke fun at the whole “Blizzard polish” that keeps getting thrown around. “So and so game should have been delayed, it lacks blizzard polish”. I think people gloss over how many major issues WoW has had in it’s years online, especially when we consider their budget and resources compared to the rest.

    WoW is/was a fun game, one I enjoyed the hell out of. But to make it out like it’s miles ahead of everything else in terms of quality because 11 million people signed up is just so wrong. Not to mention the fact that creating countless WoW-clones does nothing for the MMO industry, and Blizzard’s approach to the community, when compared to say Turbine or Mythic, is also atrocious.

    WoW the MMO, good game.
    WoW impact on the MMO space, not so good.

  10. Einherjer says:

    Pure gold, Syn! :D

  11. skarbd says:

    I have to agree with Snafzg.

    Though I will say that it is unsual for Blizzard to have a show stopper of this type. I honestly don’t get very many opportunities to have a wry chuckle at Blizzards expense.

    Now that we are in the situation where WoW has area which matches a Warhammer ORvR lakes. We are seeing the same kind of performance problems that Warhammer experiences. Now I am not sure what the player volumes are, but my point is, that even the mighty Blizzard can become upstuck occasionally. Also Blizzards initial RvR design hasn’t even lasted beyond their 1st patch release post WotLK. So I would say that Mythic have some good company atm.

    So when WoW die hards are now casting stones, their Ivory tower is no longer as clean as it once was.

  12. Bonedead says:

    The SWG “whiners” are the worst. There are still active forums where people complain about it. Not to mention all the people who see SWG anything anywhere and have to comment about how bad it is.

    Makes me sadface

  13. Leala says:

    To answer Hoki’s question. Its a really simple answer. To get attention. Its easy to get comments and “discussion” going when you do something “controversial” like poke fun at a lot of people’s favorite game. I mean, even I just fell for it and am posting a comment. And yes, poking fun at one game while trying to prove how another is better is the equivalent of “my dad can beat up your dad” from our schoolyard days.

  14. Saylah says:

    Back when Brent did the podcast, I think it was Brent, that asked about what game you’d un-make, mine was WOW. I loved WOW but the tailspin and copy-catting that has gone on I think, has done more harm than good overall. I would have been happy with an EQ2 or LOTRO, had I gone to either of those games after EQ1 and AC2 but I didn’t, I ran stumbled upon WOW.

    I’m very close to dropping the genre altogether over how stagnant it’s all become. I’m tired of popping for boxes and not wanting to stay subscribed. So I want to new model or I have to seriously face the fact that, I might stop playing MMOs. EVE is only going to carry me so far. if not for getting into W101 after bailing on WAR, hell I’d be gone already.

  15. Sara Pickell says:

    @hoki/Leala

    So… we should pretend the elephant isn’t in the room and compliment the Emperor on his new clothes?

    So somebody plays WoW for a good bit of time, but then eventually something happens and they just can’t stand to play it anymore. Obviously they should just write off all that time, forget it ever happened, check their opinions at the door and shut up before they dare to annoy someone who is still playing the game, right? Of course, the people who are playing the game don’t have to leave WoW out of anything, the impetus isn’t on them to check their comparisons at the door. On top of that, due to sheer numbers, even if some are saintly and don’t reference WoW anywhere, a fair percentage are going to be total jerks and never let it go.

    Pro-WoW, anti-WoW, it just makes me sick that we’re talking about a flame war with two relatively equal sides where it’s the community of ONE game versus the most of the community in the rest of the genre, who are mostly the ex-community of that ONE game. Bad news though, WoW isn’t going anywhere, so neither is people having opinions, and not necessarily nice ones, about it.

    Me personally? Heh. Why bother. It’s not like any one game is at fault for the MUD centric design philosophy that makes it damn near impossible to find someone whom I can have a decent conversation on virtual world design with. But this is Syncaine’s blog, it isn’t exactly a secret what his opinion on WoW is or how he expresses it. If you didn’t want to read someone humorously poking fun at WoW and it’s core cheering squad… don’t read Syncaine.

  16. [...] been to Hardcore Casual, then you are certainly missing a bit of a treat, since the blog entry Man, I’m glad I’m not playing THAT Game definitely brought a smile to my face, so go on and click the link, you know you want to. So thanks [...]

  17. Swift Voyager says:

    People love to hate things that other people love, because it makes for such good arguments.

    WoW is a cultural icon. It’s set records and written pages in history. It’s the biggest target for criticism and debate because it’s the biggest success. I’d be willing to bet that everyone in the US/EU knows someone who’s played WoW.

    Ever notice how the big discussion topics always draw such emotional responses from people who really have nothing invested in the topic? Take for example, evolution vs creation, global warming, liberalism vs conservativism. Bring up any of those topics at a lunchroom table at work and you’re sure to get several different “expert” opinions from some very emotinal people who really know very little or nothing about it, and you may even see a fight break out. Heck, our new president here in the US is a good example of a whole country making a huge decision based on little more than emotion.

    The fact that people get so invested in the subject of WoW is testament to its achievements. WoW is like Pac-Man. People will talk about it long after it’s gone. People who weren’t even born yet will know what it was and talk about it from time to time.

    So, when they release a buggy patch that was supposed to be a bug fix patch, it’s really kinda funny. It’s like the President doing a really good historical speech, with his fly down. Not a big deal in the grand scheme of things, but it’s going to be talked about and people will laugh.

  18. [...] Now having both those things in mind I would just like to say that this is hilarious. [...]

  19. Fortuente says:

    >Blizzard needs to re-examine their QA process if it failed them here. If they don’t have enough player testers on the realms, they need to give us a reason to go there, like time credits for playing on the PTR or premades to play around with.

    This could bring me back to WoW. I would be happy to occasionally play on their test realm for free. Other than that, I’m pretty sure my WoW days are over – in fact I’d almost say my MMORPG days are over … but Darkfall is coming out soon so I’ll get back to you on that one.

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